Thursday, 29 October 2009

New Use for Library Site

As the County have spent half a million to then pull out of the new library and youth centre in West Bridgford. The true reason for withdrawal from the project have started to emerge in County Hell.

The site for the proposed library is called the old stable block. Word circulating is that Ms Cutts is rumored to think the site would be better used by returning it to its former use. It is said this will further encourage the sustainable transport policy they are now promoting (see below).

As a keen equestrian (as the recent Photo of Ms Cutts shows) it has been suggested by sources that Ms Cutts thinks that re-introduction of Horses and provision of parking for such animals close to peoples places of work would work well. Officers are rumored to be investigating the costs of such a scheme.

It has been said by sources that Ms Cutts is considering giving up her dedicated parking space and coming by horse to county hall, and parking the nag at the refurbished stable block.

Wednesday, 28 October 2009

The Road (Bus, Train, Tram, Bike, Car, Lorry and Van) to Hell

Nottinghamshire County Council is about to reveal the most sustainable transport policy in the UK. This policy is everyone is going to have to walk.

The reason being is said by well placed sources to be "The most stupid, non-sensical and dogmatic thing this council has yet done, even by their own poor standards".

It is planning to withdraw from the agreement the County has with the City to consider all transport and planing within Greater Nottingham as a unified entity. i.e. Nottingham City does not exists in the minds of Ms Cutts and her transport puppet, ex secondhand car dealer Richard (the mason) Jackson.

In the past there has been a North Notts transport plan, and quite sensibly a
Greater Nottingham plan, formed jointly by both Councils. This has been the case for years. Instead there will now be a transport plan for the whole of the County excluding the City and a transport plan for the City on its own, (It is said all against the advice of the County Transport Team).

But as the County surrounds the City, if you live in one of the suburbs of Nottingham which all transport to the City has to go through, forget it. The City will sort itself out, but the surrounding suburbs will be a disaster. Potentailly this means no more joined up bus services from County to City, no more joined up planning control, no more lobbying for rail improvements.

When the whole of South Notts comes to gridlock start walking.

Saturday, 24 October 2009

This Sporting Life

Although “This Sporting Life” was a film about sport for the working classes (Football and Rugby League). Nottinghamshire County Council is now more interested in “The Sporting Life”, given Ms Cutts preferences we understand for horses and for what are euphemistically known as country sports but normally consist of murdering wild animals for fun.

Anyway working class sports are now a no-go area for Notss CC since the horsey Ms Cutts dumped the world cup football bid. Now Tory controlled Rushcliffe have pulled out as well saying its due to conflict of interests as they are the planning authority as well. However they signed up originally as major supporters of the bid and it is said the leader of Rushcliffe is a big football fan.

So why the change of tack. A rumour doing the rounds is its do with Chub. Now I don’t mean the fishy favourite of Ms Cutts’ hunting shooting and fishing mob. I mean Community Hubs, which include a library and arts centre as well as a community centre all under one roof.

The CHUBs in the North of the county are said to be at threat due to Ms Cutts plans for decimation of the library service. But there is a rumour going round County Hell that the new one in West Bridgford was also to be put at threat, unless Ruschliffe played ball (or not) if you get my meaning.

A Story of Everyday Country Folk

Jo Grundy
Speeding cars an all its not safe for horses. I saw Miss Cutts (tug forlock) riding down the Lane from her stable block on Back Lane this week. Overtaken by a car doing at least 32mph.

Clarrie Grundy
They should be done for speeding, but the limit is 60. What can we do Jo?

Friday, 23 October 2009

A tale of two Villages

They say it's not what you know (or do) it's a question of who you know. Take the case of two Nottinghamshire villages:

Blidworth is an ex-mining community. No-one has a swimming pool and horses are things you put money on. They have a dangerous road where sadly two people were killed a year ago. Since then there have been calls to have the speed limit reduced along certain sections of Main Road. There have been a number of other serious accidents involving injury.

Normanton-on-the Wolds is classical "stockbroker belt". Most people have their own swimming pool and horses abode in the several privately owned stables and paddocks. They have a rural road called Back Lane where there has never been a serious road accident and no representations for changes to the speed limit have been received.

Which one do you think had a Road Traffic Order to halve the speed limit "at a stroke"? - Normanton.

Sunday, 18 October 2009

Political Memorials

Ms Cutts is apparently proposing to introduce her own political memorials to County Hell to replace the vestiges of socialism that she has already removed. (Such as the stained glass windows presented by former mining communities that were finally carted off in a white van from County Hall last week).

It is said these memorials will be in the form of the reincarnation of the great Tory polices of the past. For a Ted Heath memorial, in memory of holder of the longest grudge in political history, we are told the three day week may be reintroduced for some staff. By reducing hours, you cut NI, pension and wages bills with-out actually sacking people.

We understand next in line will be a memorial to Mrs T with the re-introduction of the Poll Tax in Nottinghamshire.

Friday, 16 October 2009

Budget - 531 redundancies for starters

Kay Cutts has made it clear there will be draconian cutts. In an interview on Radio Nottingham she has said that it’s not her job to talk to the unions. She doesn’t seem to like talking to anyone so please keep the information coming this way.

I have got these costings for her various election pledges and actions to date (number of front-line jobs lost in brackets):

To remove the Gedling bus plug; £7.5m (300 jobs lost)

To withdraw from the tram; £5m (200)

To pay for transport improvements in Independent members divisions (see here as to why); £300,000 (12)

To establish 3 new cabinet positions; £168,000 (6.7)

To refurbish her office; £11,000 (0.44)

To remove the stained glass windows; £1500 (0.06)

To plug leaks & seek the Rev Rushcliffe; £12,000 (0.5)

To provide a fountain; £300,000 (12)

Total £13.293m (531.7)

Kay Cutts talks of a further 10% reduction but before she starts she has to add 531 to the total of job losses.

Thursday, 15 October 2009

Got it in for Mansfield

Following hot on my news about the library and resulting defection in Mansfield I have now had it confirmed that Ms Cutts and her team of henchmen are considering the future of the popular contact centre based in Mansfield. This was opened in 2006, by popular demand and in response to pressure from all parties. I understand the functions will be taken over by a much smaller team've guessed it in leafy Rushcliffe.

Not only do the Tories want to slim down the County they also want to kill off all jobs in the former mining areas.

Wednesday, 14 October 2009

Welcome to the Austerity Council

With the prospect of job losses, pay freezes, funding cutts and possible closure of libraries and sports facilities, plus raids on the pensions of public sector employees. Its good to know that some are still thriving in these difficult times.

A prominent Tory councillor (who we are lead to believe is Kay Cutts arch rival) is now driving into County Hell in his new Porche.

It is a relief that the increased expense allowances the Tory councillors voted for themselves as their first act on election are helping them continue to live in the manner to which they are accustomed.

Bollinger anyone?

Mansfield now Tory-free

Last Tory Councillor quits in disgust after 13 years.

Mansfield Conservatives are furious that Kay Cutts is possibly considering cutting their prestigious library project .

It is rumoured they are fed up with the Southern Boroughs getting all the cake, all the time. One is said to have claimed they will never get anywhere in Mansfield, whilst the County is ruled by "the southern elite" adding it's hardly any wonder that the Independents rule (in Mansfield).

It is believed that this was the final straw for the last elected Conservative on Mansfield District Council who has now left the Tories to join UKIP.


Sunday, 11 October 2009

Nobody Expects the Spanish Inquisition

We have now had it confirmed from four independent sources that Ms Cutts is forming her own version of the Spanish Inquisition to test the faith of the Reverend Rushcliffe. An investigation into this blog is underway at County Hall. It is not only trying to find the good rev but also trying to plug the leaks. Ms Cutts is said to be not amused.

While we wait to find out the details of the search it may be wise if those who work in what is now called County HELL access the site from home rather than from work computers.

This is just in case your Internet use is being watched by the head Vogon and her team of bottom inspectors.

However to all our corespondents please keep the information coming, as trying to put you off is just what Ms Cutts wants .

Thursday, 8 October 2009

Custodian of our money

From a source:

When VIPs visit the County the crowds are simply controlled by tape between portable posts. Kay Cutts doesn't like the colour of the tape in stock - it's too red. So she has instructed her officers to order some which is more blue.

As custodian of the public purse she clearly wants to cut waste - and red tape.

Tuesday, 6 October 2009

Witch hunt!

I am please to say that jobs in IT look a little more secure. A witch hunt has been launched to find out who the Reverend Rushcliffe really is. Resources are being diverted from functions such as Social Services and Educational IT support to this valuable and essential task.

Perhaps Ms Cutts needs the service of one of her county residents .

To all those of you who have supplied information, please be patient. It is taking time to sift through, cross reference and verify it all, but please keep it coming.

Monday, 5 October 2009

Is Kay Cutts a VOGON?

In the papers over the weekend there have been articles celebrating the 30th anniversary of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. In one article it describes one of the aliens in the book (the Vogons) as

"most unpleasant - not actually evil, but bad tempered, bureaucratic, officious and Callous"

As the Picture shows Ms Cutts has not taken the news well.

A Christmas carol

The Chief Executive, on instructions from Kay Cutts has advised all staff through "InContact", the employee magazine, that a 10% cut is necessary. As we know some departments are going to be worse off than others. Democratic Services will be safe with 3 extra cabinet positions to service as will some building departments with orders for laminate floors and fountains. The details including redundancies will be announced by Christmas - I am sure the Chief Exec will be quick to dispel the label of Scrooge.

If you want to get a Dickens novel out the library you'd better hurry as I understand the library service are to bear the brunt of these Cut(t)s with up to a 40% reduction in staff being talked about.

This does seem rather draconian even for the Parish of Nottinghamshire, so I'm investigating, I expect to have some more details in a few days. Watch this space.

Friday, 2 October 2009

Hasn't everyone got a swimming pool?

Kay Cutts is a very fortunate lady. She has her own private swimming pool as do most of her neighbours in leafy Normanton-on-the-Wolds. The rest of us have to use the municipal pool and leisure centre.

A few years ago there was a big row about some leisure centres which are jointly funded by the County and the District Councils. It was agreed that over a period of time the responsibility would be passed to the districts and budgets were accordingly adjusted. This process should be complete by 2012. However, I have now learned that the County now want to pull out of this arrangement early i.e. next year (2010). This will leave the cash-strapped District Councils in a mess. They can't afford to pick up the tab which they haven't budgeted for. What options will they have? Probably to simply shut the leisure centres.

But hasn't everyone already got their own swimming pool?

Thursday, 1 October 2009

New Leak from County Hall

In a new leak from County Hall, (or County Hell as its now known).

We have been told Kay Cutts wants to replace the Mosaic in front of County Hall with a fountain. (We think to recognise the New administrations achievements over the last 5 months). Officers have spent some time investigating the proposal and have found that it would cost about £0.3m.

We have been told that Ms Cutts wants the fountain so much that funding options are being investigated. An increase in council tax perhaps, a diversion of one years tram funding or a ninth reuse of the bus money previously promised to buy off the 8 independent councillors, could all be options.

However Ms Cutts is alleged to believe that the fountain (we assume to mark her efforts) will be so popular that people will happily pay for it by public subscription.

If true we will send £1.50 from our funds for comedy value alone.

Political opportunism

We must never underestimate the very high skills exhibited by Cllr Jackson when seeking votes. He learnt his trade on the forecourts of Chilwell as a second hand car salesman, no doubt with some Arthur Daley type character as mentor. He has gladly passed these qualities on to his Conservative colleagues. Take the story emerging of Kay Cutts and Dayncourt School:

Ms Cutts was a governer of this school when closure was first suggested. All the other governers voted to fight the closure plans, she abstained (rule 1; never nail your colours to the mast until you know which way the tide will run). When an election loomed and the tide was obviously turning against closure she proposed the survival plan (rule 2; once popular opinion is running, jump on the bandwaggon and claim that you got it rolling). Children were bussed in from Cotgrave to keep the school running and Kay Cutts made it an election pledge for free travel to school for every pupil beyond the statutory requirements (rule 3 promise something popular but undeliverable in order to get elected, see also Gedling Bus plug, tram etc). Because she had to give potential troublemakers cabinet positions at extra expense, she had no choice but to cancel the bus from Cotgrave. This didn't worry her as she was in power by then (rule 4; once in power the electorate will soon forget your false promises, after all it's 4 years to the next election - then you can make some more).

As they say in the motor trade "there's one born every minute" Unfortunately for Kay Cutts the electorate are not so easily conned a second time.